a sorry note to taufik

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.

Assalamualaikum wbt.

hari ni teman sedih...sedih sgt...perasaan teman bercampur gaul...rasa bersalah ada...menyesal ada....tak puas hati ada...terharu ada...ntah le....susah nak digambarkan..

semalam teman oncall...it was a sunday, so satu hari teman kat hospital...and ntah apa plak ajaibnya semalam, teman tak busy mcm biasa...pager tu bunyi sekali je...so, the whole day teman cuma tengok patient dalam ward, review deme, melayan bebudak tunku budriah yg lapar susu, malah ada time utk teman study and buat notes pun...

sampai la pagi tadi, masa teman tgh breakfast, ada sorang staff nurse terkocoh2 mencari plastik makanannya di celah2 plastik2 makanan org2 lain...teman tanya dia...cari apa, kak aisyah?...

cari nasi lemak katanya...."mana nasi lemak aku beli tadi ni...kesian budak tu lapar..."

teman pun hairan...budak mana?tanya teman...

k aisyah kata...ala, budak tunku budriah yg dlm bilik isolation tu....akak pegi ambik blood pressure dia pagi tadi..tetiba bangun tido aje, terus dia pegang tgn akak...dia kata 'mak, taufik nak nasi lemak.....'...akak pun kesian...terus pegi beli pagi tadi....

terus berkaca mata teman, nasib baik kak aisyah dah jumpa nasi lemaknya waktu tu, terus dibawaknya pada taufik...

teman memang perasan ada budak dalam bilik isolation/ bilik pengasingan tu...tapi teman tak perasan pulak budak tu dari tunku budriah, ingatkan ada mak bapak tgh menjaganya!....haih....

terus teman bukak filenya, rupa2nya, taufik ni budak umur 8 tahun...dah besar pun...kena demam campak...tu sbb kena duduk dlm bilik isolation...mak bapaknya dua2 dlm pusat serenti...

aduh....rasa bersalah yg amat sgt...bukan apa....as i said, i was not busy on sunday...i could have taken care of him if i had known that he was alone...

bayangkan budak umur 8 tahun dgn demam campak, duduk sorang2 dlm bilik isolation, without having anyone to feed him..to talk to him...to bathe him...just imagine our own son taking care of himself when he's ill...alone in a small room...and calling every female he sees as 'mak'...........

lepas tengok file tu, teman terus masuk bilik isolation tu....

and there he was....taufik....as cheerful as a boy can be....
eating his nasi lemak...

dgn mata bergenang teman tanya...'sedap ke taufik?'

'sedap!'....he smiled....

i pat his head...'taufik dah boleh balik hari ni ye...'

he nodded happily....and continued eating....i left him to go to the clinic downstairs...by the time i came up at 2pm....taufik has gone back to tunku budriah....

Oh Allah, please guide him in his life, as there is no other better guide than You...and make his path an easy one to get through please....Ameen...

wasallam.